Unconditionally
by Hayzel-Bunny
Summary: "I love you," I whispered. Silence surrounded me. I don't know how long I sat there in a pathetic heap waiting for an answer that would never come. [Mokoto's life changes when he follows Haruka to Alaska, where Haruka accepts a college scholarship. Makoto has learned one thing over the past few years: Unrequited love is hard.] AU. Slash. Mostly Mokoto POV.


Disclaimer: I do not own Free! Iwatobi Swim Club nor do I own any of the characters from Free! Iwatobi Swim Club which is based on the light novel written by Kōji Ōji, directed by Hiroko Utsumi, and produced by Kyoto Animation and Animation Do. I am not paid for writing this story.

A/N: Hello! This fic is dedicated to a very good friend of mine, who requested a little love story. I'm sorry, but I don't think this will be so little! This is the first story I've written in years. I make no excuses. All errors are my own. Brandy, this one is for you! I hope you enjoy reading!

Private message me if you want to know character pairings! Otherwise, they stay a surprise. :) Slash pairings, M/M. Eventual threesome.

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><p>Chapter 1: The One Where Everything Changes<p>

I was completely lost in a supermarket looking for my missing phone. I landed in this predicament because I found out this morning that my entire life was going to change. I took the news so bad that I went and got drunk off of my foster father's whiskey that was hidden in the kitchen cupboard. Probably not my best idea, but I hadn't really thought ahead. I had visited the grocery store earlier in the day and I was convinced my lost phone was somewhere amid the vast aisles between depression and misery. The aisle between seafood and canned goods was as good a place as any to look, anyway.

I scavenged through the aisles hopelessly. The disgruntled tones of passer-by made me aware that I wasn't being considerate during my search; their hazy faces a blur as I scavenged by them. What was their problem anyway? They weren't the ones who had lost their third phone this year! I had even attempted to place advertisements around the neighborhood proclaiming "Missing Cell Phone! If found, contact Makoto Tachibana." I belatedly realized that they couldn't actually contact me since I had lost the phone in the first place. I had had to remake the signs so they listed an email address instead.

I continued grumbling to myself as I pushed boxes of Raisin Trend onto the floor. That company should just fire the guy who named their cereal. No one liked Raisin Trend. Regardless, my phone hadn't been hidden behind the dozens of boxes where the cereal gods might have placed it.

I eventually landed in the seafood section. A huge tank housed crabs in the corner, and some of the crabs had seen better days. Small red bodies had made their way up to the surface, where they floated. I wasn't sure if the crabs were even alive or if they were supposed to be contained in that way, but I adverted my eyes.

I stood there for a few minutes, belatedly realizing that the last shot of whiskey I had downed probably hadn't been a good idea. I breathed out a sigh, and came to terms in the middle of the seafood aisle that I would be buying a new phone tomorrow. They were expensive, and I didn't have the extra money to spare.

"Makoto," said a voice from behind me.

I turned around and saw Haru, standing a few feet away from me. He was trying to make his way to me through all the cereal boxes on the floor without crushing them. I didn't remember pulling what looked like at least a couple dozen of cereal boxes onto the floor, but I couldn't deny that it was my doing. Haru was having a hard time not destroying the merchandise, and I couldn't help chuckling at the sight he made. He glared back at me as he grabbed onto one of the shelves.

"Don't laugh at me. You're the one drunk in a supermarket," he retorted.

I'm sure if I had been sober, his scathing tone would have worked how he planned. I started laughing instead. Haru's eyebrows steadily rose towards his hairline.

Haruka Nanase was my childhood friend. Most people in town would say we're practically attached at the hip. They thought it was because we didn't want to socialize and that we were stuck up in our own ways. In reality I liked to think it was only because we were dependent on each other. I knew, at least, that I was dependent on him.

"I can't find my cell," I said. I could feel the pout that had formed on my face. I almost felt embarrassed for myself. Almost.

Haru just looked at me and continued to shuffle through the cardboard boxes on the floor. I started to regret making a mess. I would probably suffer for this in the morning when the antihistamine mysteriously disappears due to some odd form of revenge our foster father decides to torture me with. Pushing thoughts of the future out of head, I decided to just leave with Haru and hope all my problems got lost along with my phone.

Haru had finally made his way to me, and he looked like he wanted to say something but was holding himself back. His face looked tight, and it was obvious he was hung up over my reaction from this morning. He reached out and grabbed my jacket sleeve, but still didn't say anything.

"Let's just go," I said. I wasn't going to make him talk about the issue in public. I looked down at my white sneakers to avoid his deep gaze and then started walking to where I thought the front entrance was. What really happened was the store tilted, and I landed on my ass in the middle of the aisle. I felt more then heard the crunch of frosted flakes under my hands and my vision of the store kept tilting.

"Come on, I got you," Haru said, pulling me up and putting his arm around me. He took a moment to support me and then steered me towards the correct direction to leave the huge supermarket. I wasn't lost anymore. Haru had found me. He always did.

We made it outside and over to my old pickup truck. The blue paint had faded over the years. I had gotten the monster used from a somewhat shady car dealership just outside of town the day I had gotten my drivers license. That had only been about a year ago.

Haruka kept a firm grip on my jacket as he struggled to open the door. After he fumbled for a few minutes, I decided to end his misery and pull my car keys out of my jacket pocket.

"Need these?" I asked with a grin.

He furrowed his eyebrows and swiftly took the keys from me. All too soon I was being pushed inside. Everything was getting hazy around the edges, but I did my best to concentrate. I shifted up while he tried to wrestle my legs and turn me into a proper seated position. All I could do was watch his face as he concentrated.

"You're so pretty," I said. I reached out and touched his cheek as gently as I could.

He didn't respond. Instead he tried to turn me to face the windshield on the worn out bench seat. I wouldn't let him get off easy anymore. Not this time. Haru was always running away. He continuously ignored the feelings I've had for him since our freshman year of high school. I struggled to face him and eventually won the battle with my legs by getting them outside the side of the truck, which caused me to slouch down towards him.

"Haru," I said, letting my voice go soft. I wanted him to know this was important. Even though the entire world was titling around me, he wasn't. He was my rock.

"I love you," I whispered.

Silence surrounded me. I don't know how long I sat there in a pathetic heap waiting for an answer that would never come. Suddenly realizing I had lost focus, I strained to concentrate on Haru. He was standing in rigid silence looking into some faraway place that I could only ever dream of following him into. I couldn't hear anything but my racing thoughts as the silence continued to stretch over us like a thick wool blanket on a summer day. I blinked my eyes and struggled to keep my thoughts coherent.

I had probably made our relationship entirely awkward again, but I couldn't scrounge up enough energy to care at the moment. I knew he didn't want to take the next step; he didn't want to ruin or complicate our friendship. Back in freshman year I hadn't even stopped to worry about his sexuality. He hadn't told me when I confessed my feelings back then and I knew he probably wasn't going to tell me now. Regardless, I didn't care. All the reasons why I had just kept my feelings bottled inside me for almost four years had fallen to the wayside. I just wanted him.

He finally looked down and reached out to pet my hair. His eyes were no longer squinted in thought and instead were focused on my shoulder. He moved to stand in between my bent legs which were suddenly feeling lanky and cumbersome in my drunken state. His sudden closeness made my breathing feel too shallow.

"Let's go home Mako," Haru said. He bent forward and kissed my forehead. My heart stuttered in my chest and I felt like I wouldn't be able to breathe anymore. Why did Haru do this to me?

My vision bleared. Haru's hands were suddenly on my cheeks and wiping moisture away. Everything felt distant. Maybe this was just another dream? I grabbed onto Haru's shoulders and leaned down against him. He was so much shorter then me, especially while I sat in the high truck seat. A giggle escaped me, and I couldn't help but think of the crabs back in the store. They were pretty short too. If I could keep one as a pet what would I name it? Giggles kept escaping me, but I hardly noticed. I shifted and remembered who I was leaning against. As fast as I had found my humor, it left me when I focused enough to see him. His eyebrows were furrowed, and I couldn't look away from his sad eyes. He seemed lost, which wasn't right. I was the lost one remember?

The haziness was approaching again, and this time I thought that I didn't want to fight it anymore. I was tired. I eventually felt him push against my legs and somehow get me fully into the vehicle. Worry ebbed at my chest. If Haru was lost, what did that make me?

Hopeless.

I curled up against the seat and after a few moments I started to doze. The last thing I saw was the ceiling of my beat up truck.

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I awakened with a horrible taste in the back of my throat and a horrible sense of dread. Sometime while I was distracted time had passed and I wasn't looking forward to meeting the reaper. I squinted my eyes and fumbled around until I had untangled myself from the bed. A groan escaped me and I quickly tried to shield my eyes with my hand before walking over to my room's adjoining bathroom.

The green wallpaper didn't ease my nausea, but the pain relievers in the medicine cabinet promised sweet relief. I didn't waste any time wrenching the medicine cabinet open. A few bottles and a tube of toothpaste fell out onto the floor in my haste, but I didn't care. One thing at a time today. Finding what I needed, I took three pills and quickly drank water straight from the facet.

Last night was the last night I decided to drown my problems. I swore off liquor right there under the bathroom facet. I didn't know how long my resolution would last, but I was pretty confident I would remember this pain for a while at least.

With a jolt, Haru's saddened face came to my mind. When had he looked so sad? I couldn't remember. Dread made itself known at that moment and clawed at my chest. Haru must have helped me out last night. Of course he had... and I must've said or done something to really upset him, which wasn't that much of a surprise.

I stood in the bathroom I shared with Haruka and stared at my reflection in the mirror. I didn't want to face him. I dreaded the day he finally decided he was sick of my antics. Haruka was all that mattered to me. This was the second town we had moved to in the past year. Other people came and went. They didn't care about us, and I didn't care about them.

My hands trembled as I picked up the tube of toothpaste and grabbed my toothbrush. I had to focus on mundane tasks to feel human again so I wouldn't worry too much. I was over-thinking the situation. I hardly even remembered what had happened but I knew I wouldn't hurt Haru. I wasn't capable of it.

I brushed my teeth and picked up the mess before leaving the bathroom. I spotted the bed and the covers immediately started crying out for me. I really just wanted to go back to sleep. It couldn't be too late because no one had barged in to try to wake me yet. I gave into temptation and slumped back into my covers, quickly making a quilt cocoon around myself. After a few minutes I felt relaxed and worry-free. Just as I was about to fall into a light doze I snapped back awake with a realization.

This wasn't my bed. This was Haruka's room. He must've dropped me off to sleep in here since it wasn't as far of a trip then my room. Haruka and I lived together since we had the same foster family. Ever since we were orphaned as children we had been in and out of several different homes, and we were always forced apart since we weren't siblings. Few people wanted to adopt double the trouble after all. There were times when we went years apart, not knowing where the other was. Every time they separated us was what I feared to be the last time I ever saw him. I'm not sure how Haruka really felt about it, but he always seemed relieved when we found each other again.

A slip of paper on the nightstand caught my eye. I reached out and grabbed it before pulling it towards my blanket sanctuary. I squinted at the font for a few moments before I recognized the letter in my hand.

_Thomas Sterling University of Alaska sincerely congratulates and welcomes you for the fall term. You have been accepted for an outstanding scholarship regarding your past athletic background in sports and swimming. Enclosed are forms required to be submitted to the registration office no later then August. We would like to further explain some of our expanded student benefits you have qualified for…_

The letter continued on but I wasn't interested in reading the rest. I read the message loud and clear, just like I had yesterday morning when Haruka had broken the news.

He was moving to Alaska. This was a big deal because for the first time in his life he was choosing to move of his own free will, and he was choosing to move far away from me. I clenched the letter in my hand, causing it to crumple. I hadn't gotten accepted to any colleges. I hadn't even sent any applications out. I had waited to see what Haru had wanted to do, and I had planned to just follow his lead. I had naively thought we would make plans and choose together. Why hadn't he told me he had sent out applications? Why did he wait until after he had made his decision to tell me?

Well I knew my decision. At this point I didn't even care if he hadn't told me because he actually didn't want me there. I loved him. He was my best friend and the only family I had. Even if he didn't love me in the same way as I loved him, I still wanted to support him and help him. Unrequited love be damned.

I would follow Haruka anywhere.


End file.
